the shit that comes out of a woman's mouth when she knows you can't hit her is fucking unbelieveable
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
you never texted me what you wanted from the store so I got a piece of chicken and bottle of tequila. if you want anything else you are on your own.
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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