Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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