what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
Randomize
