you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
Randomize