spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
Nothing like sitting at your midterm pissed at yourself because you put your graphing calculator batteries in your vibrator and forgot to put them back in before the exam 😑
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
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