lets start a swedish sibling band together
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
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