Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
Who breaks their ankle the day before a beach wedding? This guy. Maybe this is karma for fucking someone's wife? Idk.
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
I HAD TO TAKE A SHOT OF JAGER AND SOME REDBULL JUST TO SEE IF IT’LL MAKE MY MOUTH FEEL BETTER
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
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