Well douche your snatch and let's go!
haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
Randomize
