He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
Great. My funeral dress now smells of smoke and disappointing sex.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
Told him I just wanted to be friends. He responded, "The best marriages are born from great friendships." Please come get me.
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