Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
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