You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
We are finally out of the honeymoon stage of the relationship because it turns out that you can't come back from peeing on me in your sleep.
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
According to my Fitbit I was passed out in my car for 2 hours after she got us kicked out of the bar
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
Randomize
