are you so shy because you have an std?
I think the sex offender registry is kind of a VIP list. You get to not live near noisy schools and parks and all your neighbors get to know you.
i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
just took my abortion antibiotic with my martini. i no longer wonder how i got into this situation.
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
He's on the porch naked. Help.
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
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