he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
Just managed to stab myself in the ass with a fork. I feel that as my best friend, I'm obligated by friend code to inform you of that sort of thing.
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Randomize