He disabled his match.com account in front of me
just tell him i said nine months
Disregard any previous text from the past 12 hours. Except for the one about scoring a strike while drunk bowling. Remember that one.
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
I filled this oven with as much Pizza as I could, and I've been eating out of it for three days.
Just ate the last piece. Refilling the oven.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
Randomize
