Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
My dick has a subreddit
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
Randomize