my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
Randomize