If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
Seriously, I would hit on barney the dinosaur right now if it meant I was going to get laid.
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
Randomize
