and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
You had me at "let me see your balls"
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
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