Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
And I'm still awake, and you left me. Like the guy on Jurassic Park, that jumped out of the car expecting me to save myself while there is a man eating T-rex ready to tear my ass apart except theres a mathematician and paleontologist there to save me because they are bad asses.
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
Randomize
