You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
i feel so shallow. people in iran are using twitter to write hardcore nathan hale shit about dying for freedom. my last tweet was "i hate the taco shits"
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
How dare sober me try to tell drunk me I can't eat the applesauce in the fridge! Stingy bitch IM EATING THE APPLESAUCE! you can tell sober me I said that.
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
Randomize
