WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
You need to somehow incorporate the phrase "these hoes ain't loyal" into your best man speech.
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
I found more straws in my beard this morning. Please stop doing that.
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
Gay?
German.
Pity.
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
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