I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
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