roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
i just noticed 4 flies in my red wine. i drank them.
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
I said:" get your jacket, get your beer and get the fuck out of here"
Firing someone with a rhyme is the new high point in my life.
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
Randomize
