Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
Randomize
