did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
They are going to name an STD after you.
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
Excuse me. I’m a mature responsible adult.
You got your arm stuck in a vending machine trying to get fruit snacks.
I had a cast on my hand and if I paid for my fruit snacks, I’m getting my fruit snacks.
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
Randomize
