nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
this beer tastes like vomit already
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
I don't have nearly enough visine for the dryness from sticking my head out the window on the freeway for 20 minutes. Child lock me next time.
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
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