She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
You ended at least 6 stories with "and that's why I don't snort coke anymore"
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
Blood and glitter go together right?
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
Why am I always the sober one?
Cause you're the only one with any sort of self control. It's kinda your super power...
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
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