OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
My girlfriend went down on me and as she did she hummed the theme from star wars and pretended my dick was a lightsaber...I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
I would ride that face into the sunset
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
Randomize
