Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
The cops just showed up and arrested her. It's our 2nd date. Do I have to hang out her with her 3 kids until she makes bail or can I leave?
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
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