Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
Look, opening a Guinness with a steak knife and nearly cutting your finger off to make another carbomb is always a good idea.
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
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