Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
Twas still the Saturday before Christmas \nAnd it’s still fucking snowing\nAnd Steve wished he slowed down \nOn all the fucking drinking
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
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