and my herpes radar will keep us safe
Oh and apparently TSA has to open your present from my family or the terrorists win
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
She looks like a beluga.
I want to splash her with water and when she screams say "I didn't want you to die. You looked parched"
New guy at the liquor store was inexplicably fascinated by our huge jug of williams. First he said what are you gonna mix THAT with? and looked confused when I said air.
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
Randomize
