I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize
