Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
Found a left over fake Olympic medal from our party last weekend. Awarded it to a random girl in the bar last night. Its the only thing she was wearing this morning when she woke up at my place.
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
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