i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
I think I'm pregnant with his hipster baby. It keeps kicking my stomach to the beat of mgmt songs.
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
Randomize
