My brain says no but my pants say off.
so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
Banging your ex-girlfriends best friend 3 days after you break up is like saying "fuck you" with feeling. I wouldnt have it any other way.
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
You were stoned out of your mind. We were eating cold cuts and you wouldn't shut up about how it was the wettest meat you'd ever felt in your life.
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
What's more sad than going to Target to buy Plan B and the new Sam Smith album?
Randomize
