I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
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