Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
I broke stuart's oven and showed up to the party with a squirrel.
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
Nothing like ripping open the box with your keys on a sat R train and throwing back the morning after pill with some coconut water on my way to work at a fitness studio for free
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