apparently i broke a 100 dollar bill to tip the bartender on a free drink
Upon hearing of his newfound access to every orifice... even ones he just made up... the Grinch's penis grew three sizes that day.
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
I just remembered that he had fake blood all over his face last night. I woke up with it all over my dick. He was 50. Please don't judge me.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
Randomize
