Flowers- 20. Dinner-50. Drinks- 25. Hotel- 150. The look on his face when I tell him I'm on my period? Priceless.
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
Apparently on the way out of the ER i asked the nurse to doggie-bag me some more morphine.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
Maybe I'm a robot.
You can't be that drunk already
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
Randomize
