I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
dude wtf did we explode in my microwave last night?
idk but i think it had a face
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
These freshman guys were trying to holler at me from their window, and I realized about 20 minutes too late that the best possible reaction at that time would've been screaming "FLACCID PENIS". Oh, and I found this awesome zombie charm bracelet you would love.
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
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