I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction.
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
Randomize