Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
in jail i did the beyonce ass shake for the police officers & called Sally from my collect phone in my cell & started singing "im in JAAAIL IM IN JAAAIL",
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
During my first week as an adjunct prof, I played a fiercely fought game of squash with a law student and we wound up having hot, sweaty, angry sex right on the floor of the court. She is either the best or worst thing to happen to my academic career. Will let you know.
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
Randomize
