thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
... I threw up in the shower this morning
You were "I'm not drunk" drunk.
I was feeling sad so bedroom vodka seemed like the best solution at the time.
Bonded with the ladies at the perfume outlet by saying "help me smell like i'm not hungover before my shift starts". This is not where I wanted my life to be
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
Randomize
