Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
Bonded with the ladies at the perfume outlet by saying "help me smell like i'm not hungover before my shift starts". This is not where I wanted my life to be
Randomize
