Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
dude i'm inner monologue high
Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
She announced her abortion via fbk
So gin and wine won't be happening again
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
Randomize
