Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
Got out of the uber to projectile vomit in the McDonald's drive thru. Gonna take a break from the Cuervo for a while.
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
I'm bleeding and have questions
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
Randomize
