i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
well most of my day revolves around power hour
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
I'm so hungover that if we go to panera, I'll probably get a bread bowl to throw up in.
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
The prescription the hospital gave me for pain and nausea doubles for my hangovers... Maybe I'll hit up the ER more often
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
Randomize
