how can u be prego again
I should have bought two bottles, she left before I could feel her tits...
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
Randomize
