The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
Made a vodka juice box out of a ziploc bag and a straw for when I drive. Doesn't count as an open beverage container anymore.
I am drunk. Riding an elevator. You can smell the beer. Doctor on with me just smiling at me... He agrees, fuck cancer.
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
Randomize
