what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
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