Midget sex pt 2 tonight
Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
There is no amount of alcohol that can make me forget I had a Jimmy Kimmel sex dream
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
Randomize
